Dougy Mak’s Blog

Fear keeps us from excelling to great heights and limits are potential rewards. Much of the time, I have these big ideas for websites and before even giving a whack at it, I give up.  The thought of all the work it would take and the lack of resources I have access to, it just scares me and I end up scrapping the idea because it would take too long. What scares me more is the huge competitors or the thought of someone out doing me because he/she has the resource and funding. However, overtime I began caring less about these things. I developed a style and a mindset that works for me. I learned to not give a shit about my competitors; I will not let their success intimidate me. No matter how big my competitor is, they can never monopolize. I will always be able to take a part of their audience, even if it’s a tiny bit. There will be people who prefer something about your website over the other. For example, as a consumer, like many other people, I support the local mom and pop shops over corporate chains. I find myself going to a privately owned pizza joint all the time.

Another way I’ve changed is, instead of looking at the big picture as a whole, I’ve broken down the big picture into little pieces. It’s good to see the big picture, but it can be intimidating when thinking about painting it as a whole. However, it may seem less intimidating if I thought about painting small parts of the picture at a time. Paint a corner here and paint a section there and then you’ll begin noticing how these small steps add up and how effective this strategy is. Instead of going crazy about every little problem in the whole picture, worry about a piece at a time. This would provide psychological comfort by helping me calm my mind. The milestone would help me feel like I’m making progress thus producing more satisfaction and having a milestone would help keep me more motivated. So in the end, I have to tell myself: don’t worry about other people, just worry about yourself. Just keep doing what you like and what you’re passionate about and the success will follow.

About a year ago, Dragonball Evolution came out in theaters and it failed horribly. Theaters even dropped it from their line up- epic fail. It was doomed to begin with, especially when you use a Caucasian person to act as an Asian character. What is up with that? Using a white guy to play the main character who is OBVIOUSLY Asian. You would expect other directors to learn from this, but… Now we have another white guy playing the star role of Avatar: The Last Air Bender. Gosh, it does not take an idiot to realize that the main character, Aang, is Asian! It seems like Hollywood would take any chance they have (and does) just to portray a white guy as the hero.

Sometimes, we fall into a cycle where one action ultimately leads to the first  “one action”.  Some situations may be a student consistently falling asleep during class or some one who continues to stress over the same exact thing. These cycles eventually affect your performance and the people around you, and soon you’ll notice a piece of your ass missing. If you realize you are in such a cycle, then break out of it- find the root cause of it and solve it. Don’t continue to moan and groan over it, because it’s much better to just spend your time figuring out the root cause or do things you enjoy. No “buts”, just do it.

I am grateful to my friend for bringing music into my life. Before I never cared much about music, and there would be times where I actually listened to music. For christmas, I received this present, an iPod Nano, but I exchanged it for a iPod Touch instead. What matters is the thought. The music gave me a more vibrant life. The music has helped my creativity grow. The music has helped pull me through the hard times. The music has helped me keep my mind straight and has helped me sort out my thoughts as well. Music is now part of my creative process. When I need to think, I plug in the earphones and lay on the bed. I am glad he bought me this iPod- he gave me a tool to help me grow. Whether it was intention or not, I cannot return the favor. A present of this caliber is unmeasurable, so the only thing I will say is thank you. Show my appreciation by continuing to grow and make him and others around me proud. Show them that it was worth it.

Motivation is invisible force that keeps one engaged and moving forward to reach his/her ultimate goal.

What is your motivation?

Have you thought about it? My motivation spawned from someone who once told me I was not good enough, and it continues to push me today. I love to ask the question to people and hear their stories. These are one of the many things that people don’t often think about. Why is that? We all know it is important, but why is it overlooked…? Many people do not know what their motivation is, so what keeps them ticking? What is your motivation? Is your motivation to become a better person than the person that you were yesterday? Is your motivation to give back to the people that have taken care of you in your life? Don’t have one? Can’t find it? Go talk to people, ask them what is their motivation. You will probably not find your answer in their answers, but it will help lead you to yours.

Only when you are able let go, will you have room to bloom.  Whether it is letting go of a teddy bear given to you by your childhood friend, or whether it is letting go of someone you love… It hurts, and no one likes to let go of these things, but sometimes you just need to. It hurts, but it is for the best.

Letting go does not necessarily mean you are giving up, it does not necessarily mean you do not have the will to continue, it does not necessarily mean these things at all…

it means…
Letting go means you are strong. It shows that you are in control of yourself. You will not let anyone else or anything else control you. It means that you can live fine without this something/someone.

The truth is…
Sometimes not giving up means you are just a fool. It’s harder to let go than to continue holding on to something/someone or chasing something/someone that was not meant for you to begin with. However, if it was meant to be yours than it/she/he will cross your path again in the future. Understanding this, that does not mean you should be waiting for or looking forward to the day when it/he/she will cross your path again… that would just mean you have not let go or moved on yet.

Before letting go, you have to be able to identify a few things…
You may not be in denial, but the question is are you sure?
You may find yourself constantly trying to justify yourself.
You may find yourself rejecting advice from friends because you feel that the advice given has not weighed in all the variables; therefore, the advice given is biased and invalid.

Well… how can you determine if the advice given is okay to accept? Are they given by a stranger? Or are they given by close friends who have never lied… close friends who have never steered you wrong…  or close friends who have always been there for you? Friends have no reason to lie. It’s up to you to decide on who to trust.

When you have figured out who’s your ally, when you have figured out what you must do, when you have figured out that this is not going to work, when you have figured out that you need to let go and move on, and when you are able to accept the advice that you thought was wrong or even put some serious thought into that advice… then…

then…
this means…
This means you have grown.

Someone who is able to accept criticism and not let it get to them, and someone who is able to clear their biased mind and just think about it… This is what defines one who is strong and open minded.

When your realize…
that you are in denial and…
that you are just holding on to something when you know of the truth…
then you will need to find the courage to become…
Someone is able to let go. Someone who can move on. Someone who is strong…

To be patient is to “bear provocation, annoyance, misfortune, delay, hardship, pain, etc., with fortitude and calm and without complaint, anger, or the like.” Being patient may lead to it’s rewards, but the hard part to getting those rewards is maintaining your patience. You have to constantly keep your mind straight; You have to constantly remember the big picture in your mind and not get sidetracked by the little details. There will be times when you cannot maintain your patience, and there will be times when you just want to explode all your thoughts out… and it’s okay to… There will, also, be times when you realize that you lost yourself through this whole process, but remind yourself of why are you here? why are you doing this? what was the big picture? what was your original goal? Think about these questions, and it will help you get back on track.

It’s hard to be patient. There are honestly many mental obstacles to go through while being patient. Sometimes, you will even find yourself doing stupid things because of your emotions- emotions get the best of you. It is really easy for one to fall into this emotional state, so you need to be able to identify it and put on the right mindset and then continue on with what you were doing…

When it feels like all hope is lost, be patient, you will find it.
When it feels like you cannot handle it anymore, be patient, you will find a way.
When it feels like there’s no one else right for you, be patient, you will find that person.
When it feels like you cannot live without him/her, be patient, you will find out that you are better off without him/her.
When it feels like there is no one else that can understand you the same way, be patient, there is.
When it feels like there is no chance, be patient, it will come.
When it feels like there is nothing left for you, be patient, you will find something.
When it feels like your heart is broken, be patient, it will heal.

When it feels like…
be patient…
and wait, just wait…
everything will be fine…

Sharing a Special Something… It is a specific day, time, or moment that you had shared with a friend/family member/lover that you enjoyed so deeply that it had engraved a mark in your life.

It could be a time when you two had a picnic in the park with the nice summer breeze blowing through your hair while your bodies soak up the summer sun, or it could be a time when you two had laid down under the stars on a sandy beach during a warm spring night… It can be anything. It is a time when all of your worries, troubles, and life’s hastles just disappeared.

It is a time when you feel like there is no one else around, except for the two of you, as if you were in another world. It is a time when the only thing you two can hear is the soothing sounds of the relaxed environment and each others’ voices. It is a time when the two of you grow more intimate. It is a time when the only thing you two are thinking about is how great that moment is. It is a time when you two enjoy the beautiful moment. It is the most wonderful thing that two people can experience together.

For the fortunate, you should think about how lucky you are to have experienced a moment like this and to have someone to share it with. Think about how many people would wish to be in your place. Appreciate it, appreciate it, appreciate it… because I am sure your friend/family member/lover does. Think about how hard it is to produce this exciting, beautiful, refreshing, tranquil, and exhilarating moment. It is not easy and it is does not come often! Do not take it for granted, appreciate it.

For those who have yet to experience it, when you do, make sure you remember it! Because I know the other person, that you would share with, will. It is one of the greatest feeling that one can experience, so remember it and enjoy it.

An argument is a conflict of values, ideas, or whatever; It is an essential element for any relationship, especially a relationship with your lover.  It is a common belief that arguments are stupid, useless, waste of time, nonsense, or whatever. It is also common for people to think an argument consists of yelling, possibly beating, frustration, anger, and all these negative feelings. There are such arguments which reflects how stubborn people could be when it resorts to that level due to both parties refuses to give in. There are such arguments, and it shows how stubborn people can be when it results to those things because both parties refuses to give in. But, it is not about giving in and “winning” the argument or being right. It is about having both sides explain their points and then trying to understand each other. Both parties need to participate and meet each other halfway in order for good things to happen. “It takes two to tango..” So… the truth is, they create a healthier relationship. Not only do they help you feel better by releasing what’s bottled up inside, but they help two people understand each other. By understanding each other better, it helps two people grow closer and become more intimate. So the next time… are you ready? Let your partner say what they have to say; Pay full attention to just listen before your turn and then share your feelings and thoughts; And the two of you will become closer.